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Bizarre crimes from Atlanta police reports 

CLOCK O' LOVE: A police officer responded to a 911 call about a dispute on West End Avenue. A 28-year-old woman said her neighbor "Cupid Time" was making unwanted advances toward her and she was concerned for her safety. Police spoke with Cupid Time and he denied the allegations. No one else could substantiate the woman’s claims. “During my interview of Mr. Time, he seemed slightly demented or possibly mentally ill,” the officer wrote. No charges filed because, the officer wrote, “There is no probable cause to arrest Cupid Time.”    

CAN'T DODGE TROUBLE
: A 26-year-old woman walked into the Zone 3 police precinct. She said she had a leasing agreement with another woman for a 2008 Dodge Magnum and she paid the woman $538 every month for it.
She said the other woman called her and said the car had been stolen. Three days later, she said, the woman called back and said the car had not been found so she canceled their lease agreement. The 26-year-old woman said that three days after that, she figured out that her leased car had actually been repossessed — not stolen. She said the next day, the other woman sent her several threatening text messages, which read: “U Lyin bitch dat car was repor an esurance never heard or u when I c u on site ima get on dat head hoe.” And also: “Bitch ima do u so bad u fuckin thirsty trout mouth ass hoe ima keep tryn u till u do somethin hoe get seen so I bust dat head.” And finally: “tell me again in n person u dirty rat ima call da police an let dem know u filed a false report ima get my money worth u fuckn hoodrat.”
The 26-year-old woman also said the other woman threatened to come to her home on Mt. Zion Road.
The 26-year-old said the next day, an insurance company called her about a claim she allegedly filed. She said she told the insurance company that she did not file a claim with them. She said an insurance representative told her that a woman called, impersonating her and also gave the wrong information — apparently, the impersonator reported the 26-year-old’s 2008 Charger stolen, but gave the case number for the 2008 Dodge Magnum reported stolen in East Point.
Atlanta police told the 26-year-old woman to take out a restraining order and a warrant on the woman who leased her the car.

NAME GAME: A woman said she accidentally left her cell phone on the counter of a gas station on Lee Street. She said when she called her cell phone, a man named “Mr. New York” answered and offered to return her phone — if she gave him $50. A police officer wrote, “At this time, I do not have a real name for Mr. New York.” No further info.

ANGRY AT THE WORLD
: An officer responded to a call about a person on Ponce de Leon Avenue. A 47-year-old man was lying on the sidewalk, with his eyes closed. “He was initially unresponsive and nodded when I asked him if he needed to see an ambulance,” the officer wrote. While they waited for the ambulance to arrive, the man abruptly stood up, and yelled, “Fuck this shit. Either you god damn kill me or I’m gonna kill myself!” The officer wrote, “I asked [the man] to calm down and he continued to yell and curse at me, stating that he wanted me to kill him.” The officer handcuffed the man and noticed a strong odor of alcohol on his breath. The officer charged the man with disorderly conduct and took him to jail.

THE EX FACTOR: A man said he argued with his ex-girlfriend’s friend — which led to his arrest in Cobb County for making terroristic threats around 1:30 a.m. Saturday. He said he and his ex-girlfriend had been in a relationship “off and on” for five years and she had been living with him. He said they ended their relationship Saturday when he called her from Cobb County Jail. He said his ex-girlfriend told him that she and her brothers broke into his home on El Paso Road and took his house keys. The man said he got out of Cobb County Jail on Monday night. He said he met with his ex-girlfriend Tuesday at the Ft. McPherson MARTA Station and she returned his house keys. The man called Atlanta police Wednesday to report that his home had been damaged. Four window screens appeared damaged, along with the screen on a security door. Police told the man how to take out a warrant on his ex-girlfriend.  

TV RERUN: A 30-year-old woman said someone broke into her home on Glenrose Circle via the front door. She said her back door and side door were also open when she returned home. An officer wrote, “All of the rooms inside the residence were in disarray, with all of her belongings thrown everywhere.” The woman said her 25-inch television was the only thing she noticed missing. “Upon my arrival, though, she had recovered her TV,” the officer wrote. The woman said she asked around her neighborhood if anyone saw anything or knew about her TV. She said her TV showed up on the corner about 30 minutes later. No suspects.

Items in the Blotter are taken from actual Atlanta police reports. The Blotter Diva compiles them and puts them into her own words.

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