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The Blotter: Get schooled

An art college in South Buckhead was recently vandalized. The perps gained access to a locked roof area and spray-painted the walls with images and phrases such as “The Academie,” “God, Watch Over ATL,” “One Love,” and “We Are All Angels.” A school security guard was very perplexed about how the perps got onto the roof because the rooftop doors are locked 24/7.

Fuzzy math

A high school administrative assistant called police to report that some of the school’s iPads and laptops had gone missing. “She advised that she did an inventory on May 14, 2014 and she counted 30 laptops,” the cop noted. “She continued to state that when she did a second inventory on September 18, 2014, three iPads/laptops were missing.” No police report was filed until March 2015. Apparently, the administrative assistant waited six months after first realizing the items were gone before notifying police.

The cop noted, “She advised the laptops were last located in the former Assistant Principal’s office and [she] do not know where they have went after that.” (Grammar courtesy the reporting officer.)

Trash talk

At a Buckhead shopping mall, a female security guard saw a bizarre event unfold on a surveillance monitor: A man dressed in a red shirt jumped into a Dumpster outside the mall and pulled out a long metal pole, wire, and other scrap metals.

The security guard called police. A cop approached the Dumpster, where the man was sitting on trash, wires, and his purple eyeglass case. The man, a 48-year-old from Midtown, said he “needed some alone time and wanted to get away” from his friends. The cop asked the where his buddies were and the man said they were at a nearby luxury hotel. The man said his purple eyeglass case contained his drug paraphernalia, which he needed to throw away — in the Dumpster, apparently. The cop opened the case and found a baggie of suspected pot (a half-ounce), a baggie of suspected methamphetamine (2 grams), a glass tube, and a butane lighter. “Butane is commonly used to create a stronger form of THC known as butane hash oil,” the cop noted. Dumpster Man was jailed on drug charges.

Blotter Tip: Don’t dump your stash anywhere near an upscale shopping mall — expect security cameras on everything, including the trash.

Dazed and confused

In Mechanicsville, a cop spotted a white Chevrolet Classic with its lights on parked in the middle of a busy street. The engine was running. “I flashed my spotlight on the vehicle to check and see if it was occupied and it was,” the cop noted. “However, I was unable to identify if it was a man or female and if the occupant was awake or sleep.”

The cop quickly solved the gender mystery. “As I got closer, I observed a ... female in the driver’s seat asleep, I knocked on the window to awaken the woman, however the woman did not respond,” the cop noted. Louder knocks. Persistent knocks. Eventually, the woman woke from her deep slumber. “The female seemed very incoherent and seemed to be in a complete daze,” the cop noted. The woman denied ingesting any alcohol or drugs. The cop asked for her identification, and the woman rummaged through her purse. “In doing so, she grabbed one of her $20 bills and proceeded to hand it to me,” the cop noted. “I asked the female why was she handing me money, and she then put the $20 bill back in her purse and stated that she left her ID at home because before she dropped her friend off at a nearby apartment complex, they were supposed to go to a club.” (The Blotter Diva is confused by the woman’s logic: Don’t most ATL nightclubs require ID from patrons at the entrance?)

The 27-year-old woman wasn’t charged with anything linked to her alleged late-night nap. She went to jail for an outstanding warrant.

Holy tinkle

On Auburn Avenue, a 29-year-old man was busted for urinating on wall of a church. He was carrying batteries and an FM radio. The officer put the man’s FM radio into police property before putting the church-pisser in jail.

Ringer zinger

Things got weird at a jewelry kiosk at Hartsfield-Jackson International Airport’s Concourse B. The jewelry clerk told police a middle-aged woman tried on rings for a while, and during their chat the woman mentioned the specific B-gate that her flight was due to depart from. After the woman walked away, the clerk realized five silver rings were missing from the main display case. The clerk quickly called police and raced to the B-gate mentioned by the suspected thief. Alas, the woman had already boarded the plane, which was still parked outside the gate. The cop told airline employees to hold the plane while he and the clerk raced on board. They found the woman in her seat and ordered her off the plane for a few questions.

“As the suspect was standing talking, [the jewelry clerk] recognized three of the rings taken from the case were on the woman’s hands,” the cop noted. “The suspect insisted the rings were hers and in a demonstrative manner, turned her hand palms up. One of the rings still had a piece of the tag attached. I then asked the suspect to remove the other two rings — and they both had adhesive residue from where the tags had been removed. ... While talking, the suspect began rambling through her purse. In the course of removing items from her purse, a price tag from one of the rings fell from the suspect’s purse.” The jewelry clerk recognized the $79.95 price tag, but she couldn’t tell which ring it came from.

It gets even stranger: The cop asked the jewelry clerk if her company would like to prosecute the woman. “She called her manager via cell phone and I spoke with her,” the cop noted. “The manager stated that the company declined to prosecute — and that they would like to recover their merchandise.”

So the cop “returned the three rings that were removed from the suspect’s hands to [the jewelry clerk]. Since the company declined prosecution, I was unable to search the suspect and her bag for the remaining two rings.”

Items in the Blotter are taken from actual Atlanta police reports. The Blotter Diva compiles them and puts them into her own words.






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