-- Naughty kitty
Bad deeds know no season. Whether it's Christmas time, Kwanzaa, Festivus or Arbor Day, your sis deserves to know that her pooch has been wrongfully accused. Lucky for you, the holidays are about family, so we doubt you'll get kicked out in the snow. You do deserve some coal in your stocking, though, for lying.
OK, here's my dilemma: A co-worker of mine has a tendency to watch movies on the job. (We're computer engineers; he watches them on his PC). From a personal perspective, the guy is pretty cool, but from a work/business perspective, he's an utter waste of desk space. He is constantly goofing off, spreading a non-professional attitude and screwing things up. This guy talks to me like he's my buddy, but all he does is disrespect his co-workers by making us pick up the slack while he's goofing off. I'm currently involved in a plot with some other workers to get the guy fired. He's been reprimanded in the past, but no corrective action has been taken. I feel like a backstabber, but I've also got legitimate reasons for getting him ousted. Does this constitute bad karma, and if so, what do I do for retribution?
-- Work ethics anonymous
Office politics is a dangerous game, and plots to eliminate slack-ass associates have a sneaky way of backfiring. You don't have to be the instrument of his downfall; unlike in the movies, sloth rarely wins in the real world. Sit back and watch as Mr. Moviebuff's screw-ups lead to an unhappy ending.
Send confessions and questions about how to avoid karmic retribution to email@example.com, or to Karma Cleanser, Creative Loafing, 750 Willoughby Way, Atlanta, Ga. 30312. All entries are anonymous, of course.
Because they are super-duper horny, of course.
Hoping he cleaned his pooh hammer before hand