-- The idiot
Your situation is all too familiar: Boy chats with girl. Girl disses boy. Boy spews terroristic threats. Your lesson: Don't settle for anything less than a real date, which should involve forced dinner conversation, shared movie popcorn and an awkward end-of-evening "should I kiss him/her?" moment. So first, enroll in an anger management class, and second, get out there and start meeting women in person.
Dear Karma Cleanser:
My first car was a Chevy Spectra. I lost that one when my husband drove it (after I told him not to) to pay a bill and it got impounded. My second car was an '88 Maxima; it lasted a year-and-a-half. One day I told my husband to check the oil, he said he would when he got back from work. He never made it to work. Something happened and a cam broke. Our third car was a '92 Gallant. This was "his" car, the car from hell. In January someone hit my husband and a month later, the Gallant broke down near our home; hours later it was broken into and the seats were stolen. The next day it was gone. Last month someone hit my husband in the Camry I bought in April. I have to have a car but I'm scared to get another one. I used to think we had bad carma, but now I think it's just him. How do I make it stop?
The clear culprit here is your husband. We wonder if there isn't a broader theme of him wrecking your life in general. When you do get a new ride, don't let him borrow it, don't give him a lift, don't even let him look at it. Eventually his debt to the driving deities will be paid. Until then, let him walk.
Been bad? Send the universe an "I suck" letter. firstname.lastname@example.org.
Because they are super-duper horny, of course.
Hoping he cleaned his pooh hammer before hand