-- Lonely in Decatur
First of all, eww. Second, we're not sure this qualifies you for bad karma, but it certainly doesn't make you ideal roommate material. Can't you take the solo action into a non-shared space in the apartment? At least invest in some Lysol.
Dear Karma Cleanser:
I was a vocalist in a pretty hot local band, and committed the ultimate sin: I fell in love with the lead guitarist. I spent an intimate night with him, and soon after, he employed some rather malicious tactics to rid me from the band.
I was trying to move past my heartbreak when I started receiving e-mails via a dating site I was on. My ex-band member was also on this site, but this person was writing me anonymously. The person knew intimate details about me that only the guitarist would know, so I automatically assumed it was him. I wrote the guy and blasted him.
I recently found out that the guitarist did not write the e-mails (a year later). It was really a male friend of mine. I had no idea he was in love with me and had written the e-mails out of vengeance. Now I'm in a quandary. I hate having to apologize to someone as horrible as my ex-bandmate -- but his personality is not the issue. It's the fact that I unjustly accused him. Despite how things ended between us, I feel simply terrible. I've never done anything like that before, and in most cases was able to maintain a friendship with my past exes. I have begun to tell people that I was wrong about this in an effort to clear his name, and I have removed the supposed friend from my life. But I feel it isn't enough. What steps can I do to rectify this wrong?
-- Truly Repentant
Since this whole sordid affair went down over e-mail, why not fire off a nicely worded, not-quite-groveling apology letter to your old bandmate, just to clear the air. Of course, all of this could have been avoided had you followed the advice of our friend Jeanie, who always says, "Do not, under any circumstances, sleep with guys in bands. They will fuck you over in the long run."
Been bad? firstname.lastname@example.org.
Because they are super-duper horny, of course.
Hoping he cleaned his pooh hammer before hand