Karma Cleanser - July 01 2004

Dear Karma Cleanser:
I work for a father-and-son law firm. They are, for the most part, professional, but every now and again family ties rear their ugly head and the two fight like only a father and son can. The wife/mother calls here every now and again as well. It’s truly a family-run business, so there is a lot of information passed around about each other that normally would not come out (the father’s health problems, the son’s issues with commitment, etc).

My problem is when they go into an office, close the door and begin to yell, I can’t help but want to know what’s going on, not only for job security, but in general. I take some pleasure when the son gets reamed because he’s such a spoiled brat (he lives rent- and bill-free in an apartment complex his parents own, among other things).

Am I racking up bad karma by standing outside the door listening?-- Nosey Parker

A certain level of office place eavesdropping is not only suggested, it’s practically required in today’s cutthroat corporate world. But your listening patterns seem to fall outside the realm of acceptable behavior in that you’re hanging on the sordid — and should-be private — details of your co-workers’ lives. Every time you’re tempted to linger outside a family fray, put a dollar in a jar on your desk. Soon enough you’ll be able to invest in an iPod, with an accompanying set of earphones to shut out the squabble.

br>?Dear Karma Cleanser:
Back in December, my girlfriend’s friend Jack came for a weeklong visit from California. He stayed at our house and slept in our guest bedroom. After he left, I saw that he’d left his sneakers under the bed — a practically new pair of running shoes. Long story short: I’ve been wearing the shoes ever since then. They fit me perfectly, though I did have to cut off the strings, which were too long.

So now I heard that Jack is coming back for a return visit next month. He never explicitly asked if we found his shoes, but I worry that he will mention them when he’s here. I wear them often and don’t want to have to hide them while he’s visiting. But I also don’t want to give them back, especially with the strings cut off. Would my karma be ruined by just playing dumb?-- Sneaky Sneakers

Even though Jack never mentioned his lost footwear, you owe it to the guy to give him his property back. Explain that you couldn’t resist those shiny new kicks, and take him shoe shopping when he comes to town.

Been bad? karma@creativeloafing.com.