Dear Karma Cleanser:
My (live-in) boyfriend convinced me to join a new gym. We joined together to get the couples rate, even though we know we won't ever work out together. (He wants to do weights, I just want cardio machines.) After we joined, he got a call from the gym saying that he was eligible for a free meeting with a personal trainer. He went and met with the trainer, who was female. He told me that he got along well with her and wants to sign up for weekly training sessions. A few days later, I got the same call from the gym. I agreed to the free session and requested that I meet with the same trainer, thinking that if my boyfriend liked her, then maybe I would, too. She was an attractive woman a few years younger than us. I told her that she'd met with my boyfriend a few days earlier and she seemed surprised. Apparently, he never mentioned to her that he was in a relationship! Plenty peeved, I called him on it that night. He admitted that he had been flirtatious with the trainer, but only because he was trying to get a better deal for both of us on the sessions. He claims he told her later that he'd be signing up with his girlfriend. Isn't it bad karma to mislead someone just to get a deal? And even worse, to later lie to your girlfriend about it?
Maybe it's not your physical health that needs attention just now. For the sake of your emotional health, you should sit your boyfriend down and ask these questions: "Did you get me to join your gym just so you could get a discount? Did you lie about the trainer chick? And did you really think I wouldn't find out?"
Dear Karma Cleanser:
So I made a bad investment and bought a condo in a building that has a lot working against it. It's in a bad part of town, our cars get broken into, there's a loud and congested highway close by, and the condo board here is full of bitches. I'm counting the days until I can sell this shithole and move back into an apartment. The other day I was checking my mail and overheard a conversation between a real estate agent guy and a young blonde chick in the stairwell. He was telling her that units in this building are selling fast and if she didn't sign up soon then this one would be gone before the weekend. I wanted to interject and tell her to run for her life. Instead, I just got my mail and went back to my condo. Am I doomed or what?
You're not doomed, but we think you should have introduced yourself to your prospective new neighbor. Spouting a laundry list of all the reasons not to move there would have probably been too much, but at least that way she could then later come knock on your door and get the dirt if she wanted it.
Because they are super-duper horny, of course.
Hoping he cleaned his pooh hammer before hand