Opens: Jan. 30
The pitch: Will a Hawaiian hottie (Sara Foster) entice a petty thief/surfer dude (Owen Wilson) to swipe a small fortune from a sleazy businessman (Gary Sinise) in this uneventful, empty-headed crime comedy?
Flesh factor: Along with wearing skimpy bikinis, Foster skinny-dips and sunbathes nude, but the PG-13 rating keeps you from seeing very much. The sex, skin and profanity seem to have been edited out like a hotel room porno flick, so you might want to wait for a dirtier cut on DVD.
Fashion statements: More khakis and floral shirts than a Jimmy Buffett concert. Morgan Freeman's kindly island judge sports a spiffy Panama hat.
Product placement: Name brands of beer appear nonstop, and a case of Dixie Blackened Voodoo Lager provides a recurring plot point. With so many unnecessary shots of Oahu vacation spots, The Big Bounce feels like a Hawaiian tourist video clumsily disguised as a feature film.
Money shots: None apart from Foster's suntan. In brawls with Sinise's henchmen, Wilson gives Charlie Sheen a bloody nose and Vinnie Jones a broken jaw, but the film offers no cool chases, fights or tense heist scenes.
Best line: "We have the kind of friendship where, if you're in trouble, I won't be there for you," Wilson says with his patented sunbaked befuddlement.
Literary pedigree : It's based on the first crime novel by Elmore Leonard, but Bounce could have been adapted from the Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue.
Gratuitous cameos: Country star Willie Nelson appears as a police officer and cult actor Harry Dean Stanton plays a beach rat, but they don't do much besides play dominoes.
Body count: After endless arguments, teases and build-ups, just one death. One!
The bottom line: The Big Bounce feels like a desperate vehicle to make Foster a star, and since she's obnoxious rather than spunky, you gradually dread the sight of her. Wilson's mellow charms let him surf through unscathed, and Hawaii looks like a nice place to visit.
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