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Bizarre crimes from Atlanta police reports

A 43-YEAR-OLD MAN said he lost his gun at HiFi Buys Amphitheatre. The gun was in his pocket. The man said he believes the gun fell out when he laid down in the grass.

A CONCERNED CITIZEN found 10 Budweiser beers on the front porch of her home on East Lake Drive. So she called police. An officer showed up and took the 10 beers and turned them in to the police property room. They were filed as "lost/mislaid property."

AN OLD MAN called police and reported riots and a fire at a grocery store on Martin Luther King Jr. Drive. When police arrived, the old man was standing in front of the grocery store, kicking and hitting a trash can with his cane. Plus, the old man was trying to hit people who were going in and out of the store. Also, the old man was loudly cursing. The old man was arrested for disorderly conduct.

AN OFFICER responded to a call about a man shot on Northside Drive. When the officer arrived, the man was laughing. The man, age 50, said he called police. He said, "Officer, I'm not shot, but I meant to say a man hit me in the face." The officer wrote, "[The man] did not appear to be demented or under the influence of any drugs or alcohol. However, [the man] appeared to take police arrival as a joke." The man went to jail for falsely reporting a crime.

A PREGNANT WOMAN said another man got serious about her, but she rebuffed his advances because she was married. So the man took out a personals ad on">;. The ad says that if men call the pregnant woman's workplace and ask for her, the woman will have sex with them in the store's bathroom. Dozens of men have called the woman's workplace. Also, she says her picture is posted on the Internet ad.

A DRUNK MAN was found on a concourse ramp at Hartsfield-Jackson International Airport. The drunk man did not have an airport badge. The drunk man could not remember much. He said a man in a gray shirt took him down to the ramp -- but that's all he knew. An officer wrote, "No alarm had gone off on the concourse, so we could not disprove [the man's] story. The drunk man was removed from the concourse ramp and allowed to go home.

ON NORTH AVENUE, a woman said someone broke into her home, went to the refrigerator and ate some ice cream. Also, the suspect took out a microwave pizza. Nothing else was taken -- or eaten. The woman asked for a police patrol to watch her neighborhood.

A BLIND WOMAN was walking on Marietta Street. She was asking a man for spare change when suddenly she fell down a hole. Rescue teams arrived and pulled the blind woman out of the hole. (It was an uncovered Georgia Power vent.) During the fall, the blind woman broke her nose and hurt her leg and elbow.

A 39-YEAR-OLD MAN WAS FIRED from his job at City Hall on Trinity Avenue. According to the man's boss, the man said, "I will kill your motherfuckin' ass," as he walked out of City Hall.

ONE MORNING, a 23-year-old man was sitting in his home on Hunerkopt Street. Suddenly, there was another man standing in his living room. The 23-year-old grabbed a baseball bat and approached the stranger. The stranger said, "No, I'm a student. I knocked." Then, the stranger grabbed the man's orange jumper cables from the front porch and left.

AT A FAST-FOOD RESTAURANT on Campbellton Road, a 66-year-old woman drove up to the pick-up window to get her food. According to the clerk, the woman opened her bag of food and ate a French fry. The woman got mad because the French fries were cold. She wanted fresh French fries that were hot. So the clerk took the cold French fries and put in an order for some new fries. While she was waiting for the new fries to cook, the 66-year-old woman got mad and started cursing at the clerk. The clerk tried to calm the woman ... but she just got louder and cursed more. So the clerk got her manager.

Eventually, the manager decided to give the 66-year-old woman her money back. Apparently, that really pissed her off. The 66-year-old woman grabbed the clerk's hair and pulled the clerk's head into the drive-thru window. The clerk said she wasn't hurt; she just had a headache. Police arrived on the scene. The 66-year-old woman said she was hot and got upset about the fries being cold. She was ticketed for disorderly conduct -- and warned not to come back to that particular fast-food restaurant.

A MAN KNOWN AS "PSYCHO" was sitting in front of a gas station on Flat Shoals Road. A gas station clerk (known as "Chicko") wanted to press charges against Psycho for trespassing. Apparently, it was the third time in about five weeks that Pyscho had allegedly trespassed at this same gas station. Police searched Psycho and found a hit of crack cocaine on him. Also, a security guard said he saw Psycho and another guy walking away from another gas station across the street, carrying two cases of Corona beer. Then, a clerk from that gas station talked to police. The officer said, "Let me guess; the business was burglarized." The clerk said there was a hole in the ceiling and that someone broke in through the roof. Psycho admitted that he broke into that gas station with his friend, Nate. Psycho went to jail.

Items in The Blotter are taken from actual Atlanta police reports. The Blotter Diva compiles them and puts them into her own words.

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