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Bizarre crimes from Atlanta police reports

Trends in tuberculosis: At Grady Memorial Hospital, a security guard reported that a 25-year-old man walked out of the emergency room. He said the man had been diagnosed with active acute tuberculosis. The man was last seen walking on Gilmer Street in khaki shorts and a red and white striped shirt.

The last laugh: An officer responded to a dispute at a comedy club on Marietta Street. A 33-year-old woman said she was heckling a comedian when the security guard told her to stop. "[The woman] stated she was allowed to heckle comedians in Ohio and didn't know that she couldn't do that in Georgia," the officer wrote. The woman said she continued to heckle the comedian, and the guard grabbed her by the throat and arm and escorted her out of the club. She said she has cuts and bruises from the skirmish.

The security guard said he asked the woman to be quiet several times during the comedian's routine, but she refused. He said the woman stood up and knocked over her table, spilling drinks all over him. He said the woman became uncooperative, and he escorted her out of the club. At first, the woman wanted her injuries documented by Atlanta police photographers, then she said she would find her own way to the police station later. "[She] said she had a few other things to do before getting her injuries photographed," the officer wrote. No charges filed.

Sizzling tempers: At an apartment complex on Maple Street, two men fought about the pool not being open. A 26-year-old man said he asked a 59-year-old man why the pool wasn't open, and the older man got annoyed. He said the older man walked up to him while holding a knife. So he pushed the older man away and ran into the clubhouse, locking the door to keep the older man outside. He said the older man ran around the clubhouse and entered through a rear door -- and the fight continued.

The older man's story: He said the younger man shouted, "What if I kick your old ass?" and pushed him. He admitted the fight continued inside the clubhouse.

A woman who works at the clubhouse said the two fighting men somehow wound up in her office. She said she tried to get out of the way, but the fighting men inadvertently bumped her, and she fell on the floor. Her ankle was swollen and her shin was bruised.

Both men went to jail for disorderly conduct.

Runs in the family? At Grady Memorial Hospital, an employee said a woman called the psychiatric ward about 10 to 15 times and said her cousin was wrongfully admitted to the ward, that the employee was going to die, and that she had a scope trained outside Grady. Nothing further.

When in doubt, blame MARTA: On Holly Road, a 68-year-old woman said she was in her bedroom and the house started vibrating as a MARTA bus passed by, then part of the living room ceiling fell in. The falling ceiling hurt neither the woman nor her husband. The Atlanta Fire Department arrived to help them clean up.

Bringing up baby: A 44-year-old woman said her baby's father kicked in the door of her home on North Avenue and beat her up. The baby's father said he walked into the house to give the woman some money, and found her lying in bed with a crack pipe in her mouth and a man performing oral sex on her. He said he got upset and slapped her around. Initially, he gave police a fake name and date of birth. The officer ran a computer check on the man's real name. Turns out, he's got a warrant in Cobb County for probation violation on theft, aggravated assault, battery and false info to police. He went to jail.

Father-daughter wars: On Glenwood Place, a 44-year-old woman said her dog urinated in the house that morning. She said her brother asked her to clean it up, then he left. She said her father grabbed a pan and hit her elbow, causing a deep cut. She said she and her father both grabbed objects throughout the house and struck each other. She had scratches on her neck.

The father, age 78, said he was in his room when his daughter started banging on the door. He said when he answered the door, she threw a glass dish at him. He said to defend himself, he grabbed objects and struck his daughter. The father had scratches on his chest, arm and forehead. He also had an egg-shaped bump on his forehead, an officer noted. Both father and daughter were charged with aggravated assault and battery and went to Grady Memorial Hospital.

Mother-son wars: A 57-year-old woman called police because she is having problems with her son, age 23. According to the woman, her son informed her that she was going to listen to him from now on, and that he would be telling her what to do. The woman said she's the parent and she would not follow his rules in her own home. She said her son grabbed her throat for about 10 minutes before she freed herself and ran away. The officer talked to the son: "[He] was inside the location with no shirt or shoes and his pants were turned inside out." The officer noted that the mom had fresh scratch marks on her neck -- and her son had long fingernails. The son went to jail for simple assault.

Items in the Blotter are taken from actual Atlanta police reports. The Blotter Diva compiles them and puts them into her own words.

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