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Bizarre crimes from Atlanta police reports

Ceramic elephant goes upscale: An 82-year-old woman said she left her home on Darlington Road to stay with friends in the country. When she returned, she noticed that her ceramic elephant was broken (it's worth about $35). The next morning, she noticed stuff missing from another room. They include: a full-length mink coat (worth $4,000), a mink jacket ($4,000) and silver ice bucket ($30).

Ceramic elephant goes downscale: At the intersection of Metropolitan Parkway and Mary Street, a 42-year-old woman allegedly asked for a ride from an undercover officer. She was arrested for "pedestrian in roadway to solicit ride." At the jail, police inventoried the stuff in her purse. They include: two makeup kits, two decks of cards, one Bible, some costume jewelry and a ceramic elephant.

Bad day on meth: On Lenox Road, a man said his roommate was acting strangely -- like he was under the influence of a drug. An officer found the roommate standing on a creek bank outside the house. "He was wearing shorts and swinging some sort of metal rod," the officer wrote. "[He] was acting paranoid and saying someone was trying to kill him and they had guns." The roommate ran across the back yard. The officer ordered him to drop the metal rod, and he did. The officer said: "Sit down on the ground." The roommate sat. The officer handcuffed him because he was acting violent and unpredictable. "It appeared as if he were under the influence of meth," the officer wrote. As police walked him to the patrol car, the man apparently broke free and started kicking two officers. The second officer fell to the ground, injuring his knee. The first officer grabbed the roommate. "He started kicking and screaming at officers again." So the officer pepper-sprayed him. "This stopped [him] for a moment," the officer wrote. "After a minute, he started kicking officers again and broke free and jumped headfirst into a bush on the bank of the creek." The officers grabbed his ankles, pulling him out of the bush. "He kicked the officers again and then dove headfirst into the creek, while handcuffed, which was about a 10-foot drop." Once in the creek, he yelled, "Just kill me! Just kill me!" An officer jumped in after him -- and asked whether he was high on meth. The man allegedly said, "Yes." The officers called for backup units. They arrived with leg irons. The man was restrained with leg irons and pulled out of the creek. He went to Grady Memorial Hospital.

One bold move: Someone stole the air conditioner from the roof of a building where the International Brotherhood of Police Officers Union is housed. The union director said the union is there temporarily, until a new office building is complete -- but he still comes by every day to check on the temporary office on Simpson Street. No witnesses.

Holy terror? A 29-year-old woman said she works as an administrative assistant at a synagogue on Ponce de Leon Avenue. She said she talked to her boss, a rabbi, because she hadn't been paid the money owed for doing her job. She said the rabbi got agitated and said he no longer needs her services -- because he can perform her duties himself. The woman said she wanted to get her software off the computer, because the synagogue didn't pay for it. She said they could only use it while she still worked there. The rabbi warned her not to take the software, she said. Then, the rabbi pushed her, knocking his head into her chest, she said. Then the rabbi grabbed both her arms (hard enough to leave scratches) and pushed her again, she noted. The woman said she left, grabbing the computer on the way out. She said she told the rabbi she would remove the software at home, and return the computer. She walked outside and got into her car. She said the rabbi got into his car and blocked her in the parking lot -- then the rabbi got out and grabbed her car keys. The woman said she then returned the computer to the rabbi -- and he returned her car keys and pushed her a third time.

Hitting a sour note: A woman said she was carrying her daughter's band instrument (a saxophone) when she stopped to buy some marijuana at a drug dealer's house. She said the next day, she realized she had left the saxophone at the drug dealer's house. So she went back to get it. She said another man answered the door, and he had an "attitude." This man told her that he didn't take the saxophone, and she left with it yesterday. The woman went back home to look for the saxophone, but didn't find it. So she went back to the drug dealer's place again. This time, he was there. She said the dealer called her a "bitch" and said he didn't have the saxophone. She said he pushed her head as she walked away. The woman called police, and a report was filed.

Stool wars: A 52-year-old woman said she and her husband separated about two weeks ago. She said she went to their home on Roy Street to get one of four television sets they own and take it to her daughter's house, where she is staying. She said her daughter doesn't have a TV -- and her husband agreed to let her take one TV. After she loaded it into the car, she decided to take one bar stool. Apparently, her husband flipped out. She said he grabbed her arms and told her: "Put the stool back. I didn't say you could take anything else." He threw her to the ground, she said.

The husband's story: He said they got into a tugging match over the stool and they both fell to the ground. The husband, age 58, went to jail on a simple assault charge.

Forever in blue jeans: An officer responded to a call about a burglary in process at a store on West Peachtree Street. When he arrived, he noticed blue jeans lying in the road, and the store's door had been pried open. A citizen said there were three male suspects (two wearing black hoodies and one wearing a white hoodie with white writing on it.) The store's owner said the missing jeans are worth about $15,000 (brands including Raven, William Rast, Rock Republic, Joe's and True Religion).

Items in the Blotter are taken from actual Atlanta police reports. The Blotter Diva compiles them and puts them into her own words.

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