Young at Hearts 

It's Sunday, and despite my widely acknowledged heathen ways, I am in church. Well, I'm in a church. Now, let's make no mistake: I'm not here for traditional organized worship, though I'm sure plenty in the sweaty throng would like to be on the receiving end of a full service. It's Sun., July 31, and I'm at the Abbey (the former church/event dining establishment) for Will Wenke and RC Searfoss' T-Dance featuring DJ Tracy Young, and I am one of only a dozen men in attendance whose best accessory isn't an impeccably chiseled, smooth chest.

The event, Holy Wow!, caps off the weekend of Joining Hearts, an annual fundraiser benefiting nonprofits that provide housing assistance to those dealing with HIV/AIDS. And it wasn't just heartbeats pumping in unison as circuit mainstay Young delivered a set of big-room house -- pounding being the most appropriate description (cause it sounds kinda drrrty).

Then at 11:50 p.m., the lights came up and Young played a rousing remix of Fleetwood Mac's "Dreams," signaling your last chance to ask that twink for his number. Then it's shirts on and bodies out, because either God or Atlanta City Council (is there really a difference?) doesn't really want adults to be having responsible fun on a Sunday.

That's why it's now time to go to Club X for the after-party. You won't find Club X in the phone book -- well, you will, just under another name -- but this back-alley speakeasy allows the night not to end before the body buzz does. So my friend Chastity and I decide to go check it out.

About Chastity: She's a 6-foot-sumthin' black woman in a pink microskirt who, in her own words, is "Too hot to not have a dick in her mouth every night."

So here we are, at Club X, and DJ VanCronkhite is laying down a quivering tribal build-up as Bazzaar's Bill "Cigarette Paw" Kaelin (who helped bring Young) dances in the DJ booth, king of queens EJ Aviance does her make-up towering over the dancefloor, and anyone who bothered to put their shirt on to drive over reverts to their previous state of undress.

Back to Chastity: She ain't gittin' a dick in her mouth this night, at least not in this crowd. So she bums a cigarette and, standing there, bodies writhing around her, sucks in the smoke and her surroundings and comments, "Mmmm, that's a good fag." Yes, yes, indeed.

Keep one RedEye open. And send all comments, questions, observations and invitations to redeye@creativeloafing.com.

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