One can only imagine how many orifices DJ Paul and Juicy J have attempted to fill with that 2006 Oscar trophy of theirs. Despite winning the bald-headed statuette for their contribution to "It's Hard Out Here for a Pimp" from Hustle & Flow and starring in their own short-lived MTV reality show ("Adventures in Hollyhood"), one thing remains true after their Halloween night show at Atlanta's reopened 688 last Sunday: Three 6 Mafia is still un-Hollywood and unrepentant as f*ck.
By the time I got there at midnight all of the opening acts (Jamie Drastik, Tom P of Decatur, Lil Wyte and Project Pat) had finished their sets. But at least half of them were still onstage it seemed, along with Paul and J, show host Maurice Garland and a posse of untold proportions.
While the hired security on stage seemed more concerned with keeping the crowd below from getting too rowdy — a futile endeavor at a Triple 6 show — random audience members wandered at will up the side staircase leading to the stage. Suge Knight was up there front-and-center, with a pair of handcuffs dangling from one wrist as a malnourished Tupac kept his distance below. There was even a huge penis with an innocent smile onstage, dragging his oversized pink balls on the floor.
But the biggest dicks were probably the ones holding the mics. "Let me ask y'all a question. What's better: sex or head?" DJ Paul polled the crowd by round of applause. Head won by unanimous decision. But the crowd was obviously following Paul's lead.
A Civil War-era colonel was ready to attack after getting hit by a random fist when the tightly-packed crowd started moshing. Security held him back while DJ Paul reminded him where the hell he was: "It's a Three 6 Mafia show," he stated matter-of-factly, "you're gonna get hit. You're gonna get hit. It's called Down South crunk music."
Even their attempts to keep the crowd hype between songs turned into impromptu Three 6 anthems: "Throw it at me. Throw it at me. Throw it at me. Throw it at me," DJ Paul chanted, followed by Juicy J: "Throw me some weeeeed/Throw me some bloooow." Repeat.
The DJ crunk the sound back up and on the floor the Karate Kid started beating Sexy Sailor Chick with his foam nunchucks. DJ Paul led the crowd in another chant ("Snort co-caine! Snort co-caine!") before ordering "all the women to turn to the closest man next to you and give him head."
Maurice Garland, dressed as Humpty Hump, emceed the $666 Halloween costume contest. With DJ Paul and Juicy J doing the judging, the outcome was predictable. For sexiest costume, Lady Gaga (wearing real bacon) and Foxy Brown lost to the petite Ounce of Weed in the see-through Ziploc baggie. But somehow Tupac and Suge lost in the best couple category (pause) to crowd favorite Tom P's parents — whose Caesar and Cleopatra toga sheets lead DJ Paul to confuse them with Mary, Joseph and Baby Jesus.
And in the best overall category, the life-sized Penis with the innocent smile lost to the Sexy Sailor Chick. But the Dick did not go home alone. He was later spotted exiting the club with one of those Flapper girls from the roaring ’20s. An odd pairing in any other universe, they made a rather cute couple leaving the Three 6 Mafia show together.
I love this! Wise words from Methuzulah, ATL has the talent, unify and lead by…
Dave Grohl encouraging people to buy shit. What a shock.
I MADE TRACKLIST, MOTHERFUCKER!
What does it mean to be Record Store Day ambassador? I don't know. I've never…
Record Store Day seems to serve as a marketing ploy for big labels to reissue…