Friday, January 25, 2008

Governor releases Panic Pack version 2.8

Posted By on Fri, Jan 25, 2008 at 3:38 PM


(Photo by Thomas Wheatley)

My esteemed colleague Scott Freeman moseyed over to my corner office in the Creative Loafing headquarters and handed me what is to be our go-to resource if dry taps, comet strikes, and/or nuclear fallout ever befall us.

Behold, the emergency kit! Don't worry if you don't have one. According to the press release, you're part of the 80 percent of Georgians who lack the appropriate emergency supplies should catastrophe strike. Oh well, strength in numbers! I'm a little flattered that we nattering nabobs of negativism got 'em first. Included in the kit are what the average Joe and Jane would need to survive for 72 hours. Because ya never know how long it may take for help to arrive after "hurricanes and tornadoes" and "ice storms and pandemics."

The confetti-padded pack includes a first aid kit, a whistle, a weird little key-chain flashlight and a bag of emergency drinking water. According to the press release, it's missing something -- I'll take a stab at it and guess "food," or maybe "hope." Lemme look again ... nope.

Should you wish to be one of the many lucky ones to learn what this mysterious "missing" component is, make your way to the Capitol's south steps at 11:30 a.m Monday, Jan. 28, where the governor will display the basic necessities we'll have to rely on when our economy tanks and we begin eating one another.

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