>> Gas is super cheap and getting cheaper. For some reason, this is a bad thing.
>> Apparently, Manhattanites don't get drunk anymore. Polite sipping of champagne yes. Tequila-induced shouting and flailing about no. In other news, Middle America has new proof for the East Coasters-are-elitist-commies theories they shout while drunkenly flailing about.
>> Chris Weitz is named as the new director for the Twilight sequel. Because the director that jump-started the franchise's films to the tune of $200 million and counting wasn't good enough?
>> The Sicilian mob goes all Humpty Dumpty, trying to put itself back together again but fails.
>> Also failing on a massive scale: French terrorists. News flash explosives that don't explode aren't exactly terrifying.
>> The latest numbers say NASCAR drivers face far fewer accidents these days than five years ago. Back then, driving in circles was way harder.
>> In more failure news, MARTA warns of "Draconian" cuts to staff and transit options. But soon, you might be able to carry a bagel on the train along with your gun!
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