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Tuesday, April 6, 2010

“24:” 6-8 a.m. Priuses are for terrorists

click to enlarge Ethan's still out for the long haul.
  • Ethan's still out for the long haul.

Two hours of “24” is something that I truly look forward to every season. Without a doubt, you can expect to see any number of double crossings, tension building bomb deadlines, Jack attacks, and if we are lucky, blast-from-the-past characters from seasons prior. While we were only given three out of four, I have to start this week’s recap with an OMG!!1! from next week’s previews: President Logan will return. Those creepy Russians are comin’ back! Oh yeah, and Jack and Renee are finally going to hook it up.

But, I’m getting ahead of myself!

6 a.m. starts off with Gen. Bruckner and the awfully young looking Chief of Staff continuing to pull the cloth over President Taylor’s head. Is no one noticing that Ethan’s extended bathroom break has gone on a bit longer than normal?

In the tunnels Jack and Renee are still leading the Hassan’s to safety. That is until Hassan gets a hold of a crow bar that he whacks Jack upside the head with. Hassan then makes a run for it with the last of Bruckner’s rogue paramilitary soldiers to turn himself into the terrorists.

Hassan makes a phone call to Samir to ensure that NYC will not be blown to smithereens once he turns himself over, although nothing is actually promised one way or another. Frankly, with the countdown to dirty bomb reaching to 53 second mark, I was on the edge of my seat waiting for Western-hating Samir to let the bomb run out just because he hates everyone so much. Especially those filthy Americans. The let’s-kill-30 seconds montage before Tarin stops the bomb does nothing to ease the tension.

click to enlarge Pre-Jack Smash!
  • Pre-Jack Smash!

Only minutes behind Hassan and his escort, Jack promptly breaks free of his make shift holding cell and calls President Taylor to fill her in on that two-faced Gen. Bruckner. Scenes like this are what make “24” so good. Jack delivers fast and concise instructions to President Taylor who does an impressive job of not giving up her emotions while listening to Jack’s debrief. Within minutes, Taylor has Secret Service kicking in the door to Ethan’s office where Gen. Bruckner and Rob Weiss are hiding Ethan’s nearly dead body and playing out their treasonous plan. Bruckner is swiftly taken into custody, but Weiss has to stay and take a tongue lashing and bitch slap from President Taylor. Don’t mess with Allison when she gets angry!

Back at CTU the lights are back on and Chloe and Dana are busy tracking Hassan’s whereabouts. On the CTU double-crossing front, Dana/Jenny is trying her best to sneak away to reroute the servers (READ: call the terrorists!). Now that Chloe is boss, she knows when to call bullshit, and tells Dana/Jenny to sit her ass down and get back to work. Eventually Dana/Jenny is able to get away to the server room where she attempts to alert the terrorists. Luckily, the office sexual harasser, Arlo comes in useful calling Dana/Jenny’s bluff as well. Granted he almost gets USB cabled to death like poor Milton a couple of episodes back, but Chloe saves the day with a timely call to his Bluetooth headset. You have to give “24” credit for the number of shameless promotional plugs they are able to fit into every episode. My favorite are always the shots of Jack’s Sprint phone.

Eventually, Dana/Jenny is able to make a call to Tarin to give him an escape route from the ambush awaiting him and President Hassan. What follows is one of the best stomach turning moments this season.

Tarin makes a quick turn into a parking deck just before CTU would have had him cornered. Jack and the boys are able to surround him in the parking deck, but not before Tarin drives himself and Hassan off the roof of the deck to an epic death crash below.  Whoa! Hassan is dead, right?! We have an hour left people. Of course Hassan wasn’t in the vehicle. Just the President’s ex-future son in law. Hassan was swapped into the terrorist’s Prius and driven away by a woman in a blond wig. Frankly I don’t know how they let her get away when that wig looked like something you could by on the sale rack at the Halloween mega store. If that didn’t give it away, wouldn’t her dark complexion that clearly does not match with blond?! Details, people! Details!

Phew! That was just the first hour!

7 a.m. begins with Dana/Jenny trying to make her run for it out of CTU. Too bad Hastings has the joint on lock down on a staff of very efficient young security guards who won’t let Dana/Jenny’s oversized lips talk their way out of getting out of the building.

Meanwhile, Jack finds Tarin’s cell phone in the demolished car, which of course leads to Chloe, Hastings, Cole, Jack, Renee, Arlo, you get the point, realizing that Dana/Jenny is the mole. Dana/Jenny isn’t going down without a fight though! Luckily her years of armed robberies have prepared her for shooting her way out of a building. That however does not top Cole’s military training, and he has her pinned by her throat against the wall soon enough. As with most terrorists when caught, the only person Dana/Jenny will talk to is Jack Bauer.

Jack arrives at the interrogation and is given a bogus list of demands by Dana/Jenny that includes everything from full immunity, cash, and a lifetime supply of lip botox. Jack responds by reminding Dana/Jenny what it feels like to be held against a wall by someone strangling your neck before calling President Taylor. I like how Jack and Cole’s responses are becoming more and more similar as the season progresses. I wonder if now that Cole is single, they’ll figure out a way to get rid of Kim’s husband from the Vampire Diaries, and have Cole and Kim hook up. Would that be too Kim-Chase?

By the time we get back to Hassan and the terrorists, they have done quite a number on our beloved Amir Kapoor and his pompadour. Turns out, Samir wants Hassan to confess his sins on camera before he is beheaded on web cam. Of course Hassan refuses, as he still believes in the peace agreement, and he would never be seen on camera without a chance to touch up his coiffure. Samir is none too pleased with Hassan’s non-compliance and takes the easy way out of having to torture his former leader any further by just reading Hassan’s script.

Meanwhile, Chloe has figured out the exact location, temperature, time and latitude of Hassan’s location. Jack makes Renee promise to be a badass and kill people if she’s allowed to come along. Of course, she agrees. Duh! Renee is always a badass, even when she is accidentally stabbing Jack. Jack, Renee, and the CTU guys take off to rescue Hassan.

The last few minutes of this episode were hands down probably some of the best moments of tension in “24” history. Jack and Renee enter the apartment and discover the blond-wigged woman and her daughter. As they make there way through what seems like 20 fake-out closets they find a dead Hassan and pre-recorded assassination video. This end was completely unexpected and added an entire new depth to the two-hour saga. Anil Kapoor’s superb acting throughout both episodes made the discovery of his body all the more heart wrenching.

I am hoping that next week we get to the bottom of Dana/Jenny employer. Who could it be? There are seven seasons worth of bad guys to choose from!

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