On Nene's new nose from "The Real Housewives of Atlanta":
"Now you know, I've had some 'dental work' done myself. That's what we call it, 'dental work.' I mean, I've gone through two noses. And she definitely had some dental work. She's always talking about keeping it real, keeping it real. And I have to say, her nose job is not keeping it real. That's actually the theme of my show this Saturday: to keep it more real than Nene."
"I love playing Atlanta. It's the oddest combination of bling rappers and women who love Paula Deen and loud-and-proud gays. My show is going to be like Beer Fest plus Gay Pride, just a Swear Fest, where cursing and offensiveness is celebrated. If you have nothing nice to say, come to the show!"
What she'll talk about at the show
"It's all breaking-news kind of stuff. Everything I'm talking about is current and happening this week. Like that JetBlue flight attendant? And lets not forget the 'Little Chocolatiers.'"
Continue after the jump for her thoughts on Southern gays, Andy Cohen and her mother's new found fame.
On Atlanta gays and her icon status
"Southern gays wear a coat of many colors. They range from DL bros, married, loud and proud. And you know in the dirty South, it's so hot and everyone's shirtless so they have great bodies. I expect a wide-range of body types at my show, but mainly the well-dressed, in-shape body type."
"Just come to the merch table at my show and look at the bathroom line. The line to the women's room is nearly empty, and there's the longest line outside the men's room. It's like a live Gay.com meet-up. If I walk by, it's like I'm fucking Britney Spears."
On my love, Andy Cohen
"Andy loves that he's made it into my act. In my act, I talk about his ... unique perspective on cross-eyedness. At the "Real Housewives" reunion specials, he'll ask a question and the housewives won't know who he's asking it to because his eyes are going both ways."
"I'm obsessed with Lindsay Lohan and her going to rehab. Rehab today is interesting to me because it's really taken a turn from being for real alcoholics to, say, being caught cheating or saying the wrong thing. Not cheating, being caught cheating."
On being nominated for two Emmy's
"Love is easy to find, but Emmy's are fucking hard to win."
On my dad buying my family tickets to her show for my mom's birthday
"I'm so impressed! But wait—a straight will be at my show!?"
On her mom, Maggie, Mag-Let creator and new found celebrity
"Maggie is a superstar. It has gone to her head. Superstardom can be hard to deal with, and people will turn to drugs. But she's not turning to black tar heroin. Instead she deals by just taking an extra sip of Franzia. And I have a feeling there are some box-wine lovers that will be at my show in Atlanta."
Kathy Griffin performs two shows at the Fox Theatre. $51.70-$73.70. 7 and 10 pm. 660 Peachtree St. 404-881-2100. ticketmaster.com
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