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Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Clayton County teacher strips at school, gets arrested, convinces us to become vegans

And you thought things couldn't get more bizarre today than the president of the United States releasing his long-form birth certificate:

The police report says [Harlan Porter, a teacher at B.C. Haynie in Morrow who'd learned his contract would not be renewed] had been behaving unusually. Teachers told police that he was a vegan who'd sworn off soft drinks, yet he'd gone to Taco Bell for tacos in the hours before he stripped.

The arresting officer wrote in the incident report that Porter spoke of a "new level of enlightenment" and said "he wanted everybody to be free now that his third eye was open."

"I then explained the obvious problem with his third eye being opened in public," the officer wrote. "He readily agreed that his decision to remove his clothing posed a problem and stated that he understood why I would likely have to place him under arrest."

Porter put his clothes back on at the officer's request, and the officer then double lock handcuffed him into the back of a police cruiser.

Porter told the cop that he understood his career with the Clayton school system was probably over. He said he still wanted to teach, but "on a new level, with hands in the earth, gathering the essence and learning how to love one another and fully appreciate the spiritual realm."

Classes were over, the AJC reports, so no students witnessed the enlightenment.

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