Friday, May 27, 2011
Sports Ben's Sports Take: Chewing Tobacco Saves the Day for Derek Lowe
Posted by Ben Bussard on Fri, May 27, 2011 at 12:01 PM
The DUI and reckless driving charges levied against Braves starting pitcher Derek Lowe nearly a month ago were dropped on Thursday due to fame stature police error?
According to the story in yesterday's AJC, the arresting officer "jumped to a conclusion and made a lot of mistakes" during the April 28th arrest on Peachtree Road in Buckhead.
Lowe, who was driving his 2011 Porsche Panamera, was allegedly racing another driver in a Camaro and was ultimately charged with improper lane change, reckless driving and driving under the influence before being taken to Atlanta city jail despite performing "remarkably well" on his field sobriety test.
Defense attorney Bubba Head (real name) said that the alcoholic beverage odor that was detected on Lowe's breath "may have come from the pitcher's chewing tobacco."
Wow, it doesn't get more "baseball" than that, does it?
Here's a loose reenactment of the arrest:
OFFICER: "Do you know why I pulled you over, sir?"
LOWE (vigorously adjusting his manhood): "Nope."
OFFICER: "Well, you changed lanes improperly and I've got reason to believe you were racing with another vehicle."
LOWE (readjusting his manhood and channeling his in-game grit): "Nah, I've still got enough left in the tank...don't pull me yet."
OFFICER (flaring his nostrils in a whiffing manner): "Have you been drinking tonight?"
LOWE (remarkably abstaining from crotch adjustment...no, wait, he's doing it again): "No sir, I'm just polishing off my third pouch of Red Man."
While it may be good news for the Braves pitching rotation that the charges against Lowe were dropped, does anyone else find this acquittal somewhat peculiar?
Is this just another case of fame/money/notoriety bailing someone out of criminal troubles or was Lowe justifiably vindicated? I sure don't know, but I'll definitely be keeping a hefty stash of Beechnut and Levi Garrett in my glove compartment for good measure.
Comments (3)
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That's why you don't take the breathalyzer and hire a good attorney. I knew this was going away as soon as it came out he didn't blow.
D. Lowe is in his late 30's. This isn't his first rodeo.
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Not everyone who gets arrested for DUI is guilty of DUI; the media for sure seems not to understand the phrase "innocent until proven guilty beyond a reasonable doubt." the only unusual thing about this case is that it normally takes 2 years for a case to be resolved in Municipal Court of Atlanta.
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