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Gators love marshmallows.
Last night's episode opened with the immensely satisfying downfall of Joe Lee and Melinda Mickens. Tommy ensures his freedom from the ring with some blunt force trauma to Joe Lee's noggin. Melinda meets her end similarly, albeit unintentionally, and Tommy throws the pair in the back of his van and heads to Sam's trailer so he can fix it. Which, surprisingly, he does. Rather than giving Tommy some speech about the right thing to do, Sam tosses a couple of tarps over the bodies and heads deep into the swamp with his little bro. Sam seems open to a relationship with Tommy now that Joe Lee and Melinda are out of the picture. And boy are they, chomped to bits by gators so quickly and efficiently it may cause Dexter to rethink his approach.
Elsewhere in the Bon Temps backwoods, Tara, Lafayette and Jesus express frustration with Marnie's tendency to upset vampires: "Hooker, you pissed off another goddamn vampire and then took a nap," explains Lafayette to the conduit before the three ditch the witch. Back home, Jesus explains why they need to enlist the help of his shaman grandpa by recounting the tale of his ninth birthday, when he was gifted a pet goat and then forced by his grandpa to slit its throat and lick the knife, an act that filled him with power.
You know, just regular kids birthday stuff.
Speaking of regular kid stuff, "Do you really think a ghost picked up a magic marker and wrote on the wall?" Signs are pointing to yes there, so Terry calls over Rev. Daniels and blushing bride Lettie Mae (Rev. Skynnrd was busy ...). The pair sings some some spirituals and burns some sage to get the evil out, making sure to get the smoke up in the corners because "that's where the evil hides," according to the reverend. It's looking like they probably need to call in the Catholics for this job when a matchbook self-lights an arm's length away from Terry and Arlene's highly flammable faux-satin KMART sheets.
Snooki Sookie pays a visit to the MoonGoddess Emporium to do some Nancy Drew-ing about the Eric situation. She finds a flustered Marnie, who tries to turn Sookie away, saying that the store's closed. Sook turns on that suffocating Southern charm of hers — "The way I see it, a stranger's just a friend you haven't met yet!" — and Marnie concedes. She immediately channels Gran, who advises Sookie to look after Jason, steer clear of Eric and, oh yeah, get the frick outta the MoonGoddess Emporium. Later, Bill's mole Katerina and some vampire muscle ambush Marnie at the shop and arrest her. This witch has probably had better weeks.
Eric's having dreams about Sookie again. You know it's a dream because Sookie's laying in bed scantily clad with her legs demurely splayed. In real life, we come to find out, she sleeps in an oversize Precious Moments t-shirt tucked snuggly beneath one of Gran's quilts. In the dream, Godric appears to Eric, taking the very un-Godric-like stance, "She's purty, let's drank her." When Eric refuses, Godric says, again very un-Godricly, "You are incapable of love. You are damned!" The bad dream sends him running to Sookie, who listens and strokes his hair as he cries about the deceased petite vampire. The heart-to-heart ends with the two spooning, with Sookie as big spoon.
Pam's face looks terrible and parts of her chin and ears are falling off left and right beneath her voluminous black widow's veil. "Maybe there's a cosmetic solution. Some more lipstick…" Bill offers when she comes to him to complain about Marnie. "I've already tried that," she assures him. Tensions rise between the sheriffs, Pam and Bill over what to do about Marnie and her necromancer circle. Things come to a head when Pam divulges info about Eric, and gives up his hiding spot. Sorry Eric. At least you got to play kissyface with Sooks on the porch once before your True Death.
Thought: Wouldn't it be great if the amnesia spell had already worn off on Eric and he was totally playing Sookie with all of his "There's a light in you. I couldn't bear it if I snuffed it out" and "I will never hurt anyone as beautiful as you" talk? I could forgive A-Ball Hotshot for the time being if he threw a curveball like that.
WEIRD OF THE WEEK: Jason's three-way sex dream with Jessica and Hoyt, specifically the view of Hoyt's armpit as he gyrates on top of his BFF.
NEXT WEEK: Full moon. Oh. My. Gravy.
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