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Friday, August 26, 2011

'Rescue Me' Final Season, episode 7: Tommy retires?

Hey guys, sorry I didn’t recap last week’s episode. I got caught up in coordinating our Best of Atlanta party (tickets on sale Tuesday at! In a nutshell, it was super heavy. Some of the guys went to Ground Zero to reflect, and the Captain read a letter from one of his troops, written before he was killed in Vietnam. Tommy went over to Sheila’s house and ransacked the place to find out if Jimmy had written her a letter like that, sending Sheila into a rage only widows know when their privacy is invaded. So Tommy went home and hand-wrote letters to everyone and entrusted them to Lou to disperse to everyone in his life if he were to die suddenly. Tommy knew Lou would read it, so it was baited with a trail of cupcakes. At the end of the day, Franco wins a bet and becomes lieutenant for a week.

Lou arrives to the firehouse to find it’s completely cleaned up. Now that Franco is the new Lou he’s turned into an order barking, condescending asshole. Oh wait, he was already that. So he’s now that times 50. Like, now they have to wear uniforms at all times and spit-shine the floors. As Tommy put it, Franco looks like he’s about to shit out a diamond.

So then Tommy gives Lou a new letter, a real one this time, and Lou apologizes for reading the last one. Obvi, as soon as Tommy leaves he parks his fat ass and reads the real letter. Christ, Tommy Gavin can write a tearjerker, which Lou can’t contain on his face in front of Tommy, but thankfully the fire bell rang. The guys go on a call where an unconscious driver and his car are teetering over the river and Franco makes a rookie Superman mistake and the real lieutenant steps in to save the day. Lou immediately strips Franco of his blue shirt status and Franco is left licking his ego.

OMG this next part makes me so mad. So Uncle Teddy and Janet and Colleen break the news to Tommy that Teddy will be walking Colleen down the aisle, which I never understood how a daughter could do that to a father who is the only reason she’s sober at the moment. Then they announced that Tommy might not even be allowed there. God, it’s so disrespectful. So Tommy goes to an AA meeting at Janet’s insistence that Mickey is hosting to make sure he’s coming to the wedding, which goes over swimmingly and Tommy leaves with a “no” from Mickey.

Lou goes over to Sheila’s house for a very poignant lesson in science and psychology and lights a shot of vodka (a.k.a lighter fluid) on fire. He likens it to Tommy’s mind and starts burning photos of people Tommy have saved from fires over the years. He then gives Sheila the letter that Tommy wrote to her and explains that he already read his and made him realize how much he owed to Tommy. Sheila immediate tears open the letter and reads. In a nutshell, he says, “You saved me.” GAW. TEARS. Lou then repeats the whole spiel with Janet, except the fire part of it goes horribly wrong and he sets the kitchen ablaze. Janet puts out the fire and puts out Lou and tells him all she wants to hear is that Tommy quit being a firefighter.

The engagement party happens next, and everyone is being uber nice to Tommy. Even Mickey is there, so y’all know something’s up. Colleen finally womans up and verbalizes that her dad is pretty great in front of a crowded room. Whoa, and then Needles and Mickey both toast Tommy, who stops the madness and asks the room WTF is going on. Janet then explains to everyone that she read her letter — typed — proclaiming that he was retiring. Tommy almost flies into a blind rage and take Lou outside where he told Tommy that he did it to show everyone who was pissed at him that Tommy Gavin has real feelings, and that in the accidental kitchen fire his letter to Janet burned, so Lou typed a new one and added the part about the retirement. So now Tommy is stuck. He has to retire or face Janet and a whole new family of black people (Black Shaun's family. Duh). And pay for a $10,000 wedding gown.

Next week — THE WEDDING! Aw man, and then the week after that is the series finale. That always makes me sad.

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