Monday, January 9, 2012
Bobby's Reality Check "Real Housewives of Atlanta" Season 4, Ep. 9: The Dalai Lama doesn't care about Nene Leakes
Posted by Bobby Feingold @senorbobby on Mon, Jan 9, 2012 at 5:42 PM
- NBC Universal
- Kim Zolciak to camouflaged daughter: No more Chinet plates EVER!!
If there's one thing the Atlanta Housewives are good for, it's drama, which is why last night proved they're good for nothing. After a season of tense interactions between Marlo and Nene (Marlo's current boyfriend, footballer Charles Grant, was rumored to have dated Nene), the two met for lunch at a mall. The two ungentle giants came clean: "I don't want any drama." Whenever people say this, it means they thrive on drama the way a baby survives on breast milk. Marlo confessed that she had been arrested 7 times, one reportedly for slashing a girl's face in a club, or an "altercation with a young lady" as she put it. The two decided to be friends, best friends, friends in love that will share shoes because they both have humongous feet with bunions on them. Twinsies! Cynthia has been Nene's lackey up to this point. Do you think she'll be replaced by Marlo as new bestie? Cynthia, please stay away—your face is too beautiful for a slashing.
Criminal Barbie is now back in the box, and it's Socialite Barbie's time to play. Even Nene has to respect that hussle. Marlo invited Nene to the Captain Planet Fundraiser at the home of jeweler Elizabeth Dupree Lynch Kensington Waddlesworth the Fifth. Ted Turner's crazy daughter Laura Turner Seydel runs the foundation that auctions off shiney-diamonds to boozed up women. These are the real Real Housewives of Atlanta, and somehow Marlo is friends with them. Elizabeth Longbottom Butterface presented Nene with a jewelry piece inspired by the Dalai Lama. Nene asked, "Is that the Italian?" unaware of the spiritual leader. Take your feelings to Twitter, Lamz.
Poor Cynthia is married to the dinglebag of the century. While going to a counseling session at Dick Cheney's Church of Enron, the pastor tried to pacify their marital problems instead of working on actual communication as needed. At one point, he asked the couple to say things they loved about each other. Cynthia told Peter a long list, including his ability to fail at multiple business ventures. Peter answered, "It's not the stuff I love you why we're here. We're here about what we don't like about each other." What an asshole. Dump this guy!
Meanwhile in Haterville ... Since She by Sheree is as dead as one of Phaedra's Fabulous Funeral cadavers ("Funerals worth dying for"), Sheree worked out with Kim in what I imagine is an attempt to start a healthy lifestyle brand. Quick—time to pull a Bethenny "Skinny Girl" Frankel! Kandi Burrus went up to Nashville to write songs with country music drag queen Jo Dee Messina, and those two D-Listers made some beautiful music about leaving men and not leaving men. Throw in a mention of a soldier for good measure—this is a country song after all. Perhaps they should write one about the Dalai Lama. After Nene's diss, I'm sure he's got the blues.
Comments (1)
Showing 1-1 of 1
Latest in Fresh Loaf
-
5 things to do: Decatur Arts Fest
-
Fahamu Pecou deconstructs 'All Dat Glitters' on the canvas and the mic (and the iPhone) 1
He takes his artistic deconstruction of black masculinity beyond the world of fine arts with a 5-song EP of original music and a mobile app
-
City releases RFP for bike-share program in Atlanta 7
City officials want details from companies about setting up 500-bike program
- More »
Search Fresh Loaf
Top Commenters
