1. Minnesota congresswoman and horror movie antagonist Michele Bachman had lots of thoughts about President Obama's State of the Union address, which she hastily shared with that lipless freak Greta Van Susteren. Fox News' "rush transcript" of their conversation somehow manages to make her sound even less articulate than she already is.
2. A veteran Atlanta police officer was hit and killed by a car last night north of the Downtown Connector. The driver of the vehicle was arrested; predictably alcohol is believed to have been a factor.
3. Someone stole an $1,800 puppy from a Dunwoody pet store, the real crime being that a Dunwoody pet store was charging $1,800 for a puppy. Adopt, please.