DeAndre Brackensick - "Only the Good Die Young"
Dang, he actually sounds great, but I'm tired of his reggae-ish take on stuff.
Erica Van Pelt - "New York State of Mind"
Look at who got a punk rock makeover from Tommy Hilfiger! No really, she looks 120 years younger and she had the confidence of Joan Jett. She was waaaaay better this week.
Joshua Ledet - "She's Got a Way"
There are two things that happened here. 1) Joshua said he had never heard this song before he decided to sing it (and then he sang the tar out of it). 2) Steven Fucking Tyler said he had never heard this song before Joshua sang it. I can't even figure out how to use any words to make a sentence about how this makes me feel. I'm too distracted by my head spinning around and my jaw hitting the floor. PS, this is my second-most favorite BJ song, hence the new bruise on my chin.
Skylar Laine - "Shameless"
Confession - I've never heard this song, so to me it was pretty OK. The beginning was ROUGH, like she couldn't find her key or something, but then she twanged it out. Oh, thanks for letting me know, Randy Jackson, that two country artists have covered this one, so it makes sense that Skylar would have chosen to actually not step out of the box.
Elise Testone - "Vienna"
YES ZOMG, this is my No. 1 favorite BJ song (thanks to 13 Going on 30), and no one has ever sung it during Billy night. Oh good night, Tommy Hilfiger told her to wear high-waisted bell bottoms, which looks good on no one, and girlfriend chose wisely to not wear them. So, I didn't love her performance and since it's a song only, like, five people know exists, I don't think the tweens will be hitting auto dial for Elise, but then the crowd and the judges gave her a standing O, so maybe I'm being too hard on her.
Phillip Phillips - "Movin' Out"
Pffffawwwww - Tommy Hilfiger was all like, "You need help" in the fashion department. Anywhoo, Phillip Phillips made this song super creep-tastic, y'all. Like, he went straight serial-killer movie soundtrack on this one and holy shit balls, it was amazing.
Hollie Cavanagh - "Honesty"
Jimmy Iovine from Interscope Records had to explain to baby girl what this song is actually about so she wouldn't be singing it "like she was carrying in a bouquet of roses," which helped her out a lot. Too bad she still sounds like Celine Dion.
Heejun Han - "My Life"
I'm starting to get a little tired of Heejun. BOOOOOOOOOOO! Yeah, I know, I know, but seriously, I need him to take something seriously. He sounded great until he started running around singing to all of the people in the crowd and, like, making fun of the song. Nobody makes fun of BJ songs in my presence. He should've read the chapter on BJ in Chuck Klosterman's Sex, Drugs, and Cocoa Puffs to better understand him as an artist and therefore not look like a clown.
Jessica Sanchez - "Everybody Has a Dream"
And mine right now is for her to not be singing this song. Zing! No but seriously, she peaked already and needs to GTFO, but the judges lurved it and Steven F. Tyler was all like, "When God was giving out vocal chords, you were the first in line." Fine, I guess it wasn't that bad.
Colton Dixon - "Piano Man"
Hottie hotface is back behind the piano, and lord can he tinkle those
ovaries ivories. Having just spent the majority of the weekend at a dueling piano bar, this is exactly what I needed to have happen right now. He sang it in his own Plain White T's kinda way, and I farking love it. Like, "I need this on my iPod" love it.
The gang sang "For the Longest Time" and it wasn't terrible.
Hollie, Skylar, and Elise are up first and they are all safe. Lana del Rey sang a song. She's pretty. DeAndre, Joshua, and Jessica were up next and DeAndre was sent to the bottom three. No der. Yay! Haley Reinhart is back and singing her face off. She needs to lay off the bronzer.
Phillip Phillips, Colton Dixon, Heejun, and Erica were up last and Heejun and Erica were sent to the stools of the bottom three. It should be DeAndre. He's not anything unless he's singing like Maxwell, and he hasn't done that yet since the show started. Holy zomg, DeAndre is safe and Erica pixie hair cut is going home. Meh, yeah I get that. She never really connected with America.
Predictions for next week - DeAndre will actually get sent home (please, for the love of god).
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