Great article :) I started transitioning over a year and a half ago...finished surgery and have an F on my license and my parents still don't know...because yeah, you just have to ignore anyone who isn't in your corner.
This book is nothing new. Erotic romance titles have been around for years. This is like discovering how great Amy Whinehouse's music really is ten years after her death. Where have people, especially women been? The worlds largest publisher of "romantica" as they've dubbed it, Elloras Cave, has been around since 1999. And the majority of their titles would put 50 to shame.
guys like the orig. poster (& me) need to see: http://shrink4men.wordpress.com/a-shrink-f…
theres a few things you can do.... 1st,get rid of him,2nd, join him,3rd, what is he lookn for in the other gals,? can you do what he;s lookn for??? if not trade him in on a new and better man, theres other guys out there. well good luck, craig
Feel you're spot on. From what I am seeing, the book is bringing a change (will it last?) - suddenly giving women permission to act, be creative, take control & feel that what they fantasize about is mainstream- OK -& not smutty- for the very 1st time. Men (some at least) are being v surprised but loving it (& equally wondering themselves if this really can be all OK- not sinful).
But main turn on for women, pure fantasy(?)- as you suggest is not to do with submission- it would be to have their wishes respected, considered.
You folks know that almost any book on sexual dysfunction will name a religious upbringing rather early on as a common cause, right?
I had the issue where I put sex up on a pedestal- I thought that there was supposed to be some divine revelation that only happens when you are with the One True Love.
So when I was a teen and doing all of the normal fooling around, I did everything *except* vaginal penetration with my penis (ok, I didn't try to penetrate the butt either I guess). I waited until I was 19 to try that, and by that time I had already conditioned myself so strongly against it while I was sexually maturing that it was nearly impossible.
That's something that I'm still struggling with today, even though I've been atheist for years.
Vulvodynia is one of the main causes of painful sex. The National Vulvodynia Association offers support to woman with chronic pelvic pain including regional support contacts and help with a physician referral. For more information please go to:
Vulvodynia is one of the main causes of painful sex. The National Vulvodynia Association offers support to woman with chronic pelvic pain, including regional support contacts and help with a physician referral. For more information please go to:
Good lord, the vajazzle scared me before and now it is simply terrifying. I bet a bunch of the ladies in my office are walking around with a sensitive swollen mango. Yuck.
"I'm sure her diet is the culprit at least partially. She admitted to eating fast foods and the first thing that needs to be done with a chronic condition is changing ones diet, period."
i'm sure your poor reading comprehension is the culprit, at least partially
Re: "As for sex, it's still highly over-rated, so she needs to get over that."
Sex being "over-rated" is your opinion and you should not press it onto anyone else especially if they expressed an interest in how much the love it. Not only are you telling her how to feel, you're addressed the topic in an insensitive manner.
I'm sure her diet is the culprit at least partially. She admitted to eating fast foods and the first thing that needs to be done with a chronic condition is changing ones diet, period. It sounds like being in a torture chamber 24-7. As for sex, it's still highly over-rated, so she needs to get over that.
don't forget the healing crystals
Oh dear! With all due respect with the 'educated' doctors... steroids and birth control are NOT the answer to this suffering woman's problem. Even if they manage to squelch the symptoms, they will not CURE. In fact they will only cause more problems in the long run. You cannot give the body all those synthetic hormones and expect it to remain in a state of balance. This is setting her up for a domino effect of medical issues. I would suggest she start paying attention to her diet right away. NO DAIRY, immediately and reduction of other animal products slowly (if she eats them). A raw food fast and if possible fruits only (not so much citrus, but berries, melons, bananas). Here's to true HEALING, and not just the treatment of symptoms.
Finally, some backstory on the classless joke I keep overhearing at gynecology seminars: "girl, I can dish out more vulvar discomfort than pelvic floor dysfunction."
Not everyone is able to dip their stick and conveniently burst in 5-10 minutes like clockwork, and I'm not sure that is all bad. I'm in the above category and have to make sure to control my brain and whiskey to get frisky. Most relationships or partners I've had will feel anxiety if/when this comes up and I have to let them know that I am into them but the moment has me nervous. Being cognizant of this makes me feel like I try to focus harder on the goal and it makes me appreciate the woman that much more. Also, the orgasms seem more intense rather then when I can "fire at will". But if I am completely worked up and out of it, there's comfort knowing we are much more sensitive in the morning so a rest for a wake-and-shake is not the hardest of requests to take on either end.
This is definitely a double-standard; I've had women that I can't get there with conventional sex and women that came immediately. Which is better? Guys love it when a girl can't hold it in (although for me, a woman that has to put effort into climaxing is a more of a turn-on) but I doubt the same lies the other way. As long as she can be satisfied with my help, I think the relationship should not be anchored by the bed.
Not to brag, but I don't just "get there" -I have multiples. Especially after a few drinks are in me. Sometimes I wonder if women and men mentally jinx themselves -putting way too much pressure on getting there -that they can't just be in the moment. I'm sure other performance issues arise like worrying about body image and technique. You just need to let all that sexual baggage go, I think, and freely f*ck.
But that being said... I've never had to fake it. And the handful of times I've not gotten there before my man, have been because he beat me to the punch. Fortunately, he's always good about taking care of me before and after ;)
Plus, as guys get older, I find that they need to have the first one out of the way in order to last longer in round two -which I get more enjoyment out of anyways. :)
I've always had mine from clitoral stimulation. On the topic though, I'm presently seeing someone who could not orgasm the first two times we had sex. I thought it was me, my ego was a little bruised and i was embarrassed. We talked and I later learned that his inability to climax with a new partner is linked to his comfort level. Ha! There does seem to be a double standard when it comes to climaxing. Men are supposed to while women are supposed to fake it....sucks but oh so true in many instances.
I agree that an orgasm is not the most important thing in the world if you're in a loving relationship.
And sometimes maybe you're just not going to have an orgasm, for whatever reason.
But I do wonder if that statistic of 70% of women who have trouble orgasming might also correlate to the statistic that 70%-80% of women don't orgasm through vaginal penetration alone.
See what you think of this... www.youtube.com/watch?v=XRHBhTtB0Jg
Creative Loafing Atlanta
Powered by Foundation