Tipping: These women work for tips and tips alone. Knowing that, do not come into a strip club with barely enough money to cover a round of drinks. Do not look repeatedly at a dancer performing without tipping her, and do not, under any circumstance, sit at stageside seating without a pocket full of dollars. How much will you need for a night? If you're an average drinker, figure at least $20 an hour for a drink or two and stage tipping. Lap dances are $5, so account for that too if you think you'll find the woman of your dreams, which you will, so add it in now.In other words, come correct or don't come at all. No word, however, on whether or how those tips get split at the end of the night. If it's anything like the norm at Atlanta's adult entertainment venues, we have a good idea what to expect.
1. Buckhead 10.4%Other salacious ATL-based data:
2. Ormewood Park 9.3%
3. Decatur 8.7%
4. Sandy Springs 8.1%
5. Snellville 7.9%
6. Midtown 7.4%
7. Downtown 7%
8. Candler Park 6.8%
9. Cascade Heights 6.3%
10. Oakdale 5.8%
° Adulterers in Cascade Heights have the most affair partners on averageI don't know what's worse: That a site like this exists or that I've never heard of it. Ashley Madison is like the most damning case of western excess, individual freedom and no-holds-barred capitalism ever created. Boasting 32 million members in 46 countries, it's practically a godsend. And further proof that the institution of marriage is totally screwed. A quick Google search shows the site has skirted plenty of controversy in recent years, especially as its expanded its illicit empire into foreign territory. In particular, the governments of Singapore and South Korea banned AshleyMadison.com. Marital infidelity is criminal in South Korea, but that didn't stop more than 135,000 members from signing up before the country began unsuccessfully attempting to block it last year, according to Time. Other Asian countries, such as Japan have been more inviting. More than half a million joined the site there within eight months.
° Downtown has the most men looking for mistresses
° Midtown has the most members aged 35 and younger
Jane Hansen, the court's public information officer, writes in the case summary:
FACTS: Brookhaven is a new Georgia city that became incorporated Dec. 17, 2012. The Pink Pony strip club has been in business for 22 years, serving food and alcohol, along with nude dancing, since licensed to do so by DeKalb County in November 1990. Trop, Inc. operates the club, which has always been on Corporate Boulevard and is now located in the southernmost area of newly incorporated Brookhaven.
From 1991 to 2001, the Pink Pony and other adult entertainment businesses filed several lawsuits against DeKalb County for enacting ordinances like Brookhaven's that prohibit total nudity and liquor in adult businesses. Eventually, a number of the establishments entered into a Settlement and Release Agreement with DeKalb County in which the businesses agreed to dismiss pending damages actions in exchange for the right to continue operations. The agreement was extended in 2007 for a minimum of 15 years. The establishments also agreed to pay the County an increased, graduated licensing fee, which for Pink Pony in recent years amounted to $100,000 a year.
If you've been following the "Love and Hip Hop Atlanta" sex tape drama, God bless you, first and foremost. Over the past five days, reality show cast member Mimi Faust has gone from baby's mom to NSFW meme. And her "leaked" sex tape trailer with struggle-R&B singer Nikko has spawned a TMZ-reported shortage of industrial-strength shower rods at Home Depot due to the popularity of their graphic shower scene, an unending stream of #mimishowerrod tweets, ridiculous spoofs, the X-rated song "Shower Rod", newly released by her partner-in-porn Nikko to capitalize off of the hype, and a slew of think pieces on the racial politics of sex tapes.
The only response from Faust, the 44-year-old single mother of her daughter with LHHATL castmate and producer Stevie J, has been an Instagram pic suggesting folks mind their own business if they don't pay her bills.
But it hasn't had the desired effect. There haven't been this many memes and think pieces concerning black women's sexual agency, or supposed lack thereof, since Beyonce added surfboarding to the Kama Sutra. Inquiring minds want to know: Is Mimi the next sexually empowered Kim K on the come-up or another desperate ho
usewife on the downfall?
On Dec. 22, as most of metro Atlanta rushed to wrap Christmas presents and responsibly sip eggnog, a DeKalb County Superior Court judge dismissed the Pink Pony's lawsuit against the city. The strip club claimed that a Brookhaven ordinance passed last May by the baby city banning nude dancing in establishments that serve alcohol was unconstitutional. If enforced, the Pink Pony argued, it would force them to close their doors on the business located just off Buford Highway. By the end of the week, the strip club's lawyers had filed an appeal to Georgia's highest court.
Since the early 2000s, the strip club had operated under an agreement with DeKalb County that allowed it to continue showcasing nude dancers and pouring drinks, provided it pay $100,000 in annual licensing fees. It wanted Brookhaven to respect that arrangement and grandfather in the strip club. Brookhaven, which was being advised by an attorney well-versed in similar battles, declined. In addition to the lawsuit, the strip club launched a public relations campaign. And some residents wanted the baby city to back off the long-standing adult business.
Brookhaven Mayor J. Max Davis said in a statement following the lawsuit's dismissal on Dec. 22 that he was, as expected, "very pleased" with the outcome. He also said the judge "upheld Brookhaven's sexually-oriented business regulations and resolved the numerous legal issues Pink Pony asserted in this lawsuit."
We've yet to see a copy of the judge's order. But according to Alan Begner, the lead counsel for the Pink Pony and longtime legal eagle to metro Atlanta's adult establishments, the DeKalb ruling is a first for him. Rather than going through the process of discovery, the judge opted to dismiss the case outright. If allowed to stand, he argues, the ruling could hamstring other people's abilities to mount constitutional challenges in court.
The big question now is whether Brookhaven will actually enforce its ordinance. A city spokesperson last week said officials are "currently consulting the city's legal team to fully understand the court's decision and discuss plans for enforcement."
Until then, Begner said, it's business as usual at the strip club.
"We will continue like we were before, which is dancing and serving alcohol," he said. "If Brookhaven thinks this is a big victory and they can start enforcing their law against us and try to put us out of business, and the Supreme Court of Georgia sends the case back, then the amount of damages that will have occurred in the 10 months or so to now, will easily exceed $20 million."
Begner notes that's a conservative estimate.
Georgia is among only four of the 50 states in which ebony porn searches ranked highest on the site, with Alabama, Louisiana, and Maryland rounding out the bunch. So how shall we interpret these findings?
Through a hot and steamy racial lens, of course!
If you head over to Pornhub.com - which I did in the name of journalistic research - and type "ebony" in the search engine, the top three results are interracial videos of the white-on-black variety. Some of the more interesting titles among them included "Rihanna Rimes gets white [word that rhymes with sock]" and "James Deen Pounds a Gorgeous Ebony Girl." Probably not with his fists, though.
The intersection between race and sexual power dynamics in porn is almost an inevitable topic, especially considering the South's segregationist history. Writers have long intellectualized over the enduring popularity of such age-old stereotypes and taboo tropes as strapping black bucks deflowering virginal white maidens and white male conquerors dominating libidinous black vixens. There have even been recent exposés over the very real persistence of racism in the porn industry, itself, like the wage imbalance between blacks and whites and the standard that says white women who engage in black-on-white scenes do irreparable damage to their professional reputations and future earning potential.
But before boiling Georgia's favorite porn search term down to the leftover vestiges of colonialism, it's important to note that the state has one of the highest concentrations of African-American citizens in the nation. Same goes for the South in general. In fact, the six states with the highest ranking African-American populations, according to the 2010 U.S. Census, coincide almost perfectly with Pornhub's "ebony" state search preferences. So, tempting though it may be, the salacious race factor might not paint the total picture, other than revealing the nation's racial divisions and ethnic clusters by geography, as shown in this color-by-numbers demographic dot map provided by the Census.
Other news sure to belie those assbackwards Southern stereotypes?
The Pink Pony, which first opened in 1991, has squared off over the past couple months against the newly formed city in North DeKalb County. The city has passed ordinances that, starting next year, prohibit nudity and alcoholic beverages in adult establishments. The new law would force the strip club located close to Buford Highway and North Druid Hills Road to move or shut down. Rather than invest in a bulk order of tassels, the club has sued the city.
In recent weeks, a "Save the Pink Pony" Facebook page has called attention to the club's continued fight to remain in operation. The website has attracted more than 100 supporters who side with the business, which, according to a May PolitiFact story, has never violated an ordinance or state law.
"The Pink Pony is under threat of being forced to close by the newly created city of Brookhaven near Atlanta, GA," the Facebook page reads. "With the creation of the new city, the founding fathers have decided to 'Zone Out' any existing businesses that are not to their liking."
The Pink Pony's lawsuit against the city is still pending and the club has even suggested de-annexation back to unincorporated DeKalb County (yes, we know it takes a lot to go back there).
Not to be confused with Diamonds of ATL, the hetero gentleman's club where rappers such as Ludacris have been known to make it rain, Black Diamond Atlanta is the name of a new weekly showcase due to feature transgender strippers at XS Ultra Lounge in Midtown.
It's being billed as the first transgender strip club experience in Atlanta, with a "sneak peek" preview party set for April 24. "There's never been anything like this in Atlanta before," lead dancer and spokesperson for the weekly event, Chanel Monroe, told the Georgia Voice. Judging by the flier and Facebook page, Black Diamond Atlanta's entertainers will be performing gender roles similar to their all-female counterparts. Which mean it's probably safe to assume bands will make them dance.
And what would Valentine's Day be without such rankings to remind us of the market economy's successful commodification of our unquenchable desires? This one comes courtesy of uStarNovels.com, an online publisher of customized romance and erotic novels. The company crunched data from 2,000 of its nationwide customers, gathered over the past few years, to deduce that Atlantans are hot to trot. Their simple, self-serving methodology included adding up the "number of erotic books ordered by city," then dividing by population to get a "Sexiest City Per Capita Ranking."
Here's the ranking of the top 10 sexiest cities in America, according to the company's sales data, and a word from its press release, which shamelessly plugs "Hotlanta":
3. Las Vegas
4. San Diego
9. New York
10. Los Angeles
Looks like the Biggest Romantics are located in Atlanta, with 3 times the amount of erotic books being purchased per capita than Chicago, Dallas, Houston and San Diego. Earning the nickname 'Hotlanta', Atlanta ranks 6:1 over New York and Los Angeles (per capita).
In an ironic sort of way, these numbers could mean the exact opposite of what's intended. Could it be that Atlantans find so much lacking in their real love lives that they have to turn to desperate, paint-by-numbers fantasies for self-satisfaction? The company's online order form allows customers to input such details as character names, eye and hair color, favorite food, and favorite music to "co-author a 160 - 180 page authentic personalized" paperback at $35.95 a pop, in which Atlantans get to imagine themselves having lusty adventures in exotic locales around the world - i.e., anywhere besides home.
Or they could just read our annual Lust List issue, out today, and stalk some real-life Atlanta beauts. Either way, it's nice to know our standing as the City Too Consumed With Pent-Up Lust To Hate remains safe. For what it's worth, I hear we purchase a lotta dildoes per capita, too.
Happy Valentine's Day, y'all!
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