It's been a surreal two years for '80s-influenced indie-rock band Black Kids, who scaled the heights of blogger hype and then came crashing down to earth with their recent major-label debut, Partie Traumatic. Still, who wouldn't want to have a major-label record deal and be big in the U.K.? So if you want to be like the group, just follow these 10 simple steps.
1) Form hipster band in the otherwise culturally barren town of Jacksonville, Fla.
2) Name band Black Kids, despite only having two members (siblings Reggie and Ali Youngblood) who are actually black.
3) Play before a tiny (but Internet-savvy) crowd at Athens Popfest, inspire torrential downpour of blogger kudos.
4) Release free four-song EP, Wizard of Ahhhs, featuring instantly gelling electro- and guitar-focused jams that inspire the new-wave clubbers as much as the shoegazers. Include songs that speak to love lost and cocks blocked, such as masterpiece "I'm Not Gonna Teach Your Boyfriend How To Dance With You."
5) Receive a startlingly high 8.4 rating from Pitchfork on the EP. Prepare to have people shout out said number in concert.
6) Become practically household names in England and get recognized on the street there, while still toiling in (relative) obscurity here.
7) Enter into major-label bidding war and secure record deal with Columbia.
8) Rush out perfectly serviceable album called Partie Traumatic, including the same songs featured on the EP but also other jittery tales of unrequited dance-floor lust such as "Listen to Your Body Tonight" and "Look at Me (When I Rock Wichoo)."
9) Get trashed by Pitchfork, which gave Partie Traumatic an abysmal 3.3, accompanied by the words "Sorry :-/" and a picture of a pair of apologetic pugs.
10) Have your album bomb upon its American debut (No. 127) but go over gangbusters in the U.K. (No. 5). Frown. Smile. Repeat.
Black Kids with the Virgins, the Magic Wands. $15. Tues., Sept. 23. 9 p.m. The Earl, 488 Flat Shoals Road. 404-522-3950. www.badearl.com.
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