Every summer, a billion stories are written about iced tea. Every Christmas, a billion are written about fruitcake. And every Halloween, a billion more are written about candy corn, everyone's least-favorite thing to find in his trick-or-treat bag.
I haven't tasted the stuff in many years but bought a bag over the weekend to see if it would still taste as wretched as I remember it. Yep, though not quite as stale. I've always thought that there must be limited stores of candy corn that, like Claxton fruitcakes, are recycled every year.
My strangest encounter with candy corn occurred many years ago, when I was working for the weekly newspaper in Elberton, Ga. Every year, nearby Anderson, S.C., hosted a huge fair. It was the first place I ever saw a bona fide freak show. It was also the first time I had seen art made out of beans glued to plywood. (Shells and macaroni were a usual alternative.)
Among the entries in that year's art contest was the usual "Three-Bean Jesus," as I'd come to call the ubiquitous portraits of Christ rendered in legumes. But this one included a halo of candy corn. It didn't win anything, but I bought it and gave it a place of honor in my home for many years, until all the beans and candy corn dropped away, leaving only the remnants of glue, rather like the shroud of Turin.
In case you're not up on your candy corn facts, I've compiled a few links.
You don't have to eat candy corn. It makes a great decorative accent.
When I was in grammar school, I remember girls making necklaces out of candy corn. It's great to know that candy corn still inspires fashion.
Rich people love Neiman-Marcus' so-very-wry candy corn charm bracelet ornaments.
Who knows what cruelty to animals is involved in the manufacture of candy corn? At last, here's a recipe for making vegan candy corn.
Speaking of political correctness, a food writer for NPR just had to sing the praises of candy corn last Sunday. Click here for the transcript.
Mmmmm. Now you can combine candy corn with your favorite cereal. Rice Krispy Treats with Candy Corn.
Maybe you don't wanna make art out of legumes and candy corn. But you can make cool sculpture that is inspired by it.
If you're better at words than visual arts, write a poem about the stuff.
Or just become a collector of candy corn bric-a-brac. I found nearly 1000 items to bid on!
(Image: Mickey Candy Corn Mouse pin from ebay. Hurry, only 12 left at this writing!)
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