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Thursday, March 24, 2011

Top Chef All-stars: The long, tired slog to the finish line

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  • Courtesy Bravo TV
Dang, they are really milking this thing, no? Not content with the regular, top 3 finale, we instead get a top two finale, which means two full episodes of a show with not enough contestants on it to make for interesting television. This week, Isabella is his cocky annoying self...A LOT, Blais talks about how he choked his finale and is anxious...A LOT, and Antonia is kind of likable and sane and therefore obviously doomed A LOT. Meanwhile, Padma says "Remember this envelope?" over and over and over again until the hour is over and we can look forward to more of the same next week. Yay!

Spending this much close-up time with Isabella is kind of akin to being stuck in a horror movie. You want to look away but can't. Because you have to blog about it. Or because it's so sickening and depraved, those teeth, that head...is he really as appalling as I think, or am I losing my mind? Has spending this much time with this show turned me into a murderous psycho? Is it me or Bravo? I can't tell.

Here are my observations from the show: Wolfgang Puck is adorable. Can we please have him on every episode?

I wish they had made the contestants dress up as the mothers of the chefs while they served them.

I really like Antonia but coconut curry? Really? Haven't we seen that a zillion times on this season alone?

Isabella's lobster/steak tartare thing looked F-ING GROSS! If I saw that on a menu I'd be like, "We gotsta order that, it sounds disgusting!" Olive caramel? Nast.

I'm tempted here to write a manifesto about all the reasons that Blais must win this damn thing, but I'm scared I'll jinx the outcome.

And now we've got to have one more week...one more week of the horror. (Seriously, I am pretty excited to see what Blais' dream restaurant is in next week's episode, and even more excited to eat there if he wins and makes it happen in Atlanta. But shhhh, don't tell anyone.)

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