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Thursday, December 15, 2011

'Top Chef' season 9, episode 7

Posted by Debbie Michaud on Thu, Dec 15, 2011 at 11:03 AM

Keep your green tea away from my rustic Southern farm-to-table ROOOAAAARRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • "Keep your green tea away from my rustic Southern farm-to-table ROOOAAAARRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
I hear PETA had a real problem with last night's "Top Chef." and by PETA, I mean People for the Ethical Treatment of Asians. Horrible Heather continued on its path of rage and destruction in the kitchen roaring angrily about anything "too Asian."

Ty-Lör wins a Don Julio tequila Quickfire challenge and $5,000, but not immunity. Then Padma tells everyone to pair up with the person next to them for a double-elimination elimination round. So OF COURSE Heather and Bev get paired up. This is why I never stand near people I hate. Or near criers. Then Padma lets the bomb drop: Not only will an entire team get eliminated today but the cheftestants will also be the chefjudges (that one doesn't work as well, I guess). Sarah's mind explodes at the thought. This is the HARDEST THING EVER.

The Challenge™: Prepare a dish for a game dinner, as in quail and moose and jackalopes and stuff, for chef Tim Love and all his chef buddies.

I always wonder when a line-up of local chefs comes in to judge the cheftestants, about who feels like the bigger chump: the cheftestants who have to perform or the local chefs because they're not on the show?

Anyway, everyone gets to cooking and boy are things heating up in the Kitchen™. Bev can do no right in Heather's glowing, rage-filled Godzilla eyes. Ask a question and Heather spits a fireball and yells, "She doesn't think like a chef. She asks a lot of questions like a sous chef would ask." That reminds me of this one time on "Project Runway" where one designer called another a "good tailor." Low blow. Or as Ed said, "I respect Beverly, she's a competent chef and honestly, Heather's being a complete bitch."

Ty-Lör and Ed win the challenge and $10,000 to split and Dakota/Nyesha, Chris J./Grayson and yup, Heather/Bev end up in the bottom. Judges' table is its usually dark and weepy until the camera hits Heather and the shrimp hits the fan (see what I did there?). Seriously who takes two days to peel shrimp? SOMEBODY ANSWER ME!!!!!!

Padma: "Well I think it's clear that the pressure of the competition is starting to sink in."
Tom: "That's irrelevant. We don't really care."
Hugh: "The potato was like WHAAA?"

HA. Tom is such a dick.

Nyesha and Dakota both jump to Bev's defense, but they are no match for the Heather and ultimately get sent home.

LCK: Whitney vs. Nyesha vs. Dakota
The gals have to cook a dish only using a wok and cactus as the main ingredient. IF EVER, there was a challenge for Bev and Heather to face off in, this is it. Oh well. Nyesha wins, which is good ’cause I likes her.

TALLY:

IN: FuziOH: Paul, Edward, and Grayson
JMF: Lindsay, Paul and Chris J
totm: Edward, Grayson, and Chris J
themamrtyparty: Lindsay Paul, Ty-lor

OUT: Nom Nom Nom
Carol Singer, who's emailed in with Chris C, Paul and Dakota

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Sooooooo Nyesha COULD get back into the show? I don't watch the LCK so I'm not sure how it works or why it's there. That gurl is guud and Dakota fuked her. She deserves another chance.

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Posted by Nom Nom Nom on 12/15/2011 at 12:58 PM

NOMs are you picking a new 3?

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Posted by Debbie Michaud on 12/15/2011 at 6:11 PM

Chris C., Edward and Sarah, But if it possible, Nyesha will make it back into the game.

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Posted by Nom Nom Nom on 12/19/2011 at 10:46 AM

I don't know why people think Nyesha is good. I admit, I didn't watch the first few episodes closely, but I had the impression Nyesha was going with the "don't fuck up, not necessary to shine, just exist until we get closer to the end" strategy. What has she done to impress? I'd really like to know. She does seem to have determination and confidence in her abilities, and she totally got ripped off in the elimination.

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Posted by themartyparty on 12/19/2011 at 6:26 PM
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